Owen's Prediction

Those of you who know Scott, know that he is obsessed with taking showers.  He is a hygiene-freak, bordering on obsessive-compulsive when it comes to bathing.  Based on this fact, brother-in-law Owen has drafted a prediction as to what might transpire if good ol' Scotty has a mishap when "hovering" over a Guatemalan latrine.
Just don't slip on the hover maneuver. That could cost you years and millions in counseling.

I can hear the dialogue now....


Location: Shwanky psychiatrist's office in North Austin. The year is 2010.

Scott: I was Ok with the dirt floor. Sweeping made it better.

Shrink: Good Scott. You were accepting your lack of control over your environment. That is a healthy release.

Scott: I was even Ok with bathing once a quarter so we could have water to drink. It was a fair trade off.

Shrink: How did you feel about your wife drinking the water you could be using to wash yourself with?

Scott: So selfish of her...no, no, I didn't mean that. It was all fine until the day.

Shrink: The day? What happened Scott?

Scott: (Sobbing uncontrollably) I,,,,,,I,,,,i can't talk about it. I almost can't even remember what happened. It was all a blur. (more sobbing). I can't go on.

Shrink: Scott you have been coming to see me now for 6 years. It's time for you to go on.

Scott: Ok. The mystery meat dinner smelled wrong but it looked so right. I knew I shouldn't have eaten all of my serving and the other 6 portions.

Shrink: Go on.

Scott: I was hovering over the open pit we called a bathroom. I was there for 3 hours, it wasn't my fault.

Shrink: It's Ok Scott, you can trust me.

Scott: My foot, it was on some loose sandy soil. It slipped.........(agonized crying now) I fell naked... caboose-first into the pit and I couldn't reach the...........

Shrink: Scott?....... Scott?..........      Edna bring in the smelling salts.   He has passed out again.

Maybe you should start studying under the resident squat master - the female in your house.